Future plans

I got a phone call, she wanted to return a few misc. items of mine.

It was now the afternoon of day two 2009.

She rejected my offer to pick up my stuff the next time I was on the road later on in the week, she wanted to pass by now and be rid of me. She explained that she called everybody and told them the news. By everybody I mean she called all of her family and friends none of which I met. They were mostly understanding of the situation and her turning point that made her even consider speaking to me again came from her male best friend who now lived in the states. I was surprised that anyone would have been on my side or that she would even call her friends in the states to tell them.

It didn't take her long to reach and it quickly became clear that she wasn't here just to drop off my stuff. She was now sitting on my veranda just looking at me with the saddest look on her face and I kept my distance just to be safe, this was all new ground to me. In explaining to me what was going on in her mind she couldn't hold it together any more so she went inside and was laying on the couch, I followed her and sat by her feet. At this point in time she just let it all out, how much she liked me and how she had everything all planned out. The key thing I took away from that conversation was that she wanted to have a child with me around 5 years from now. wow, what ever I was doing I must have been doing it right.

I knew girls liked to plan but this was definitely a first for me. During the hours of her getting things off of her chest she eventually managed to jim screechy around in the couch and was now cuddling me, crying every now and then and now she was trying to kiss me. I was confused, I knew she didn't want to pursue a relationship with me since I got another girl pregnant but she was getting pretty restless on my couch grinding on me and full on eating my face. Once again I threw out all of my "man" training out the window and I stopped it from going further.

Many hours had passed and it was time for her to leave, I walked her down to her car and she stopped for a goodbye kiss. It got pretty hot and heavy quickly and I had to dig deep not to do anything stupid that night, I knew this was going to be the last time I would see her for sure. I watched her get in her car but she didn't drive off, I went over to find out what was wrong and she was just slumped over her steering wheel crying like there was no tomorrow. What could I have said to make her feel any better? I just stayed with her until she was composed enough to drive and that was the last time I saw her.

The final nail in the coffin

Day two 2009.

She calls me to wake me up at 6am so she can come by and pick me up so we can go walking up the hill I hate so much, mountain spring. This was the first time I was seeing or talking to her since I found out that the other girl that she wasn't too fond of was preggers for me. How to break it to her? I had about 30minutes of hill climbing ahead of me to try and figure it out, nada. On the way back down I wrecked my brain trying to figure out how to slip it in the conversation and luckily for me close to the bottom a guy was walking up carrying a little baby. This was the sign I was not looking for so I just lifted the hammer and started putting in the nails

me: I called back xyz yesterday.
her: of course you did, what did she want?
me: she was calling to let me know she was pregnant.
her: for who?
me: me
her: *jaw drops open and she walks off in silence*

I picked a good time(if any ever existed), we were almost back to her car. Now for the awkward silence as I drove us back to my house. I normally leave upset girls to sort out their feelings so I didn't try to say anything her after she walked off but on the 4 minute ride back home I peeped over at her and noticed she was busy deleting every trace of me from her mobile phone. Yup I could have seen this coming from a mile away, anyway she confirmed my suspicions that this will be our last encounter when she patted me on the shoulder and said 'good luck' before driving off without hesitation.

The magic word

Day one 2009.

I came home this morning around 1am with a friend, it was the first time she was staying over. She cuddled up to me in bed pretty quickly and we were off to sleep. In the morning we went to her church to start the year off right, it was my first time back in a roman catholic church since prep school.

While she was at my place she was all over me. 2009 was going well so far, a potential girlfriend in my lap telling me all the dirty things she wanted to do with me. What magic words could possibly stop anything happening between us? The phone rang a bit but I didn't answer. I returned the calls after she left and heard the last thing I expected "I'm pregnant".

She forgot her heels when she left, I should see her tomorrow. How do I tell her?

Winter solstice

So today was the shortest day in the year for those of us up here in the northern hemisphere, did anyone notice? The winter storms seem to be pretty bad in the states but the weather here is a nice cool 80 degrees here in Jamaica, I love this weather.

So what have y'all been up to? I went Christmas shopping yesterday and bought exactly one gift. I guess lots of family and friends this year will be disappointed as usual. I have a problem with buying gifts, if I don't know what someone wants or will appreciate they will end up getting nothing. That is much safer than buying them something that never gets used or thrown out.

Anyway is it just me or did Christmas skip Jamaica this year? Not many people have up the usual decorations and the traffic is not there. There isn't much Christmas music on the radio either, if it wasn't for my stash of Christmas mp3s it would just be like any other time of the year. One noticeable difference is the amount of people shopping at pricesmart though, that store is cleaning up this year.

This is a bit off subject but re the love life conversation started out in the comments. I am currently at a crossroads and the outcome may have long lasting effects, all I can say is stay tuned lol

Tables turned

It was after 5pm, training just finished and I was trying to make it to the bus stop when I heard someone shout 'Adrian!!' in a happy voice. They could not have been calling to me, anyone who knows me well enough to be screaming my name knows to save themselves from that potentially embarrassing situation that occurred. I turned around and scanned the area.. nope didn't know anyone but there was a girl standing in front of the Dyoll building looking right at me with a big grin on her face.

As I walked over to her and she(clearly oblivious to the look of disgust on my face) threw her arms up expecting a hug but I stopped short as I was not about to touch this stranger or even pretend to know them. I asked for her to identify herself and tried to look at her work ID but she snatched it back quickly and said her name.. it was #1 crush. She was a bit meaty when I used to like her back in the day but not this plump apparently life has been good for her.. food wise.

To my surprise while talking to her she took out her phone and showed me she still had my number and thanks to my name being Adrian I was at the top of her contact list. I thought I was the only person who kept peoples numbers for a ridiculous amount of time even if I don't talk to them. Anyway she tried to explain why she kept my number but didn't use it before she had to run off. She called me later and said we should do lunch while I was in New Kingston but she didn't.. how typical of her.

The few days I took the bus I also made a friends with a few other girls who shared the same route with me, who knew the bus would have been fun and the girls so friendly :) My interactions with them were too short lived for me to feel the need to exchange any form of contact information with them but in retrospect they would make some convenient friends since they all lived fairly close to me. lol I should modify my friend making policy for the next time if I ever take the bus again.

On a somewhat related matter I mention the NWA had changed the traffic flow in New Kingston as well. Well last week I should have zigged when I zagged and I ended up with a traffic ticket.. damned police and road changes. Well it's not so bad, I haven't gotten a ticket in long time and I had many near misses and was due one.

from the origins to the end

So she called me at 1:30am and asked if she could sleep over, it had been over a year since I've last seen/spoken to her. Seeing that I was fast asleep, dazed and confused I said sure without giving it much thought. It only took her a minute to drive over so I went outside let her in and went back to bed, the only light on in the house was a candle to repel mosquitoes(yeah I'm a bad host). She stood by my room door and asked if I wasn't going to give her a tour.. I had forgotten this was the first time she was coming to this place.

After the tour I went back to bed assuming she would find something to do with herself or sleep too but she said she was wide awake and seemed like she wanted to talk. She took off her skirt and snuggled up right beside me leaving a large empty space on the other side of the bed and about 1foot of space for me to sleep, yep we were back to square one like it was 2005 and I just met her again. It will be sad if we have to talk about why she and I would never work out again.

She behaved herself and only asked a few questions about what I had been up before allowing me to sleep after I explained to her I had prior obligations at 6:30am. Of course by the time she left me alone I was wide awake and she dozed off leaving me trying to wrap my mind around what was going on. I was proud of myself, a hot woman in a g-string was laying on my chest and I had no desire to do anything with her(self control: tick). Knowing her that probably got her juices flowing even more but she probably knows I will never go down that road again.

I would love if we could be friends again, she was very fun to hang out with but I don't think she is willing to settle for that alone. She said she disappeared for so long because she can't control her feelings around me, sounds like a hot steaming pile of bs to me but I guess there may be some truth to it. I will always remember how she took me under her wing and ensured I lived a pampered life when I first moved out on my own at 22... thanks Original!

How random.

On an off topic of random things, last month I noticed someone new, Clivia, linked to me(thanks) and put me in a new section by myself labeled "Male Bloggers - Men that write ..how SEXY". I have since been trying to figure out if that's a good or bad thing. Everything on her site is carnival or Trini related then there is me. go figure.

For those of you looking for a sex scandal

Last week a local paper posted the latest scandal College girls gone wild and since then a barrage of people from all over the world has been hitting my blog looking for the photos. Upon further investigation I realize that I was ranked 2nd for the search of "naked uwi girls" on google thanks to my uwi carnival post earlier this year with a few scantily clad girls. Poor pervs they wouldn't find those pics online any time soon... well not until today at least :p

I went to the other side of town today to attend a 2 day workshop and I met a cute UWI girl during the lunch break. Apparently her mother was in the workshop and also works at that location so she often hangs out at that office and studies. She seemed like a really fun girl so we chatted for a bit then it hit me that since she was in the mix of things maybe she knows about this sex scandal. My word did this girl have the hook up, she brought up email and began to show me pretty much every recent local sex scandal. So for those curious onlookers I will post one of the cleaner pics of the UWI girls she sent to me.

I'm not sure how effective my censoring is but I'm sure these girls would appreciate it. Now when I went to UWI my friends and myself were mostly dirt poor.. where do these girls find such a nice boat to have their night sexcapades on? My next question is whats with all the girl on girl on girl action? There is no shortage of men out there (like me.. I'm single :p)

I'm sorry for those of y'all who were expecting more pictures but such is life, find a uwi person to send them to you. On that note I need to find some reason to go up to campus, this coworkers daughter reminded me how hot uwi girls are. Maybe if I see her around that office again I could try something :p the last time I checked the jury came back with the verdict that coworkers daughters were fair game lol.

on easy street

So I spent the last 4 days in Montego Bay "working". I have never really spent any time in Mobay before, I've only just driven through the town a few times before so I learnt a few things during my stay there.

• Not to diss anyone but the food there sucks(well the restaurant at my hotel at least and in the town as well). It wasn't just me, I heard someone else from Kingston complaining about the food as well.
• Traffic there is 10x worst than Kingston. The town is always in gridlock cars parked everywhere, a sea of people walking in the middle of the roads and everybody trying to fight their way through the stoplight/sign-less intersections(all 500 of them)
• The local girls there are to die for. I drooled over the girls at work, I drooled over the girls on the road and I drooled over the girls at the hotel. How can any man get any work done over there? I think a few of them were checking me out too, it's a shame I wasn't staying long over there.

I'm not really a big fan of going out by myself so I didn't really do much while I was there. Since I was in a tourist town on the coast I had to go to the beach, so one day I left work at 1pm and went over to the Aquasol park for a swim alone. The "Theme Park" theme must have been boring beach, I never saw what the hype was.

I also went for a stroll on the hip strip alone one night. Every last local there thought I was a tourist, put on their fake accent and tried to talk to me. One lady and her friend tried to stop me to talk(for what reason I don't know). She asked where I was from, I muttered Kingston, she wasn't convinced I was Jamaican, she went on to cuss me for not stopping to talk and shouted that she knows my type as I walked on "you don't talk to people darker than yourself". All I could do was turn around to look at her in amazement and shake my head no as I walked off. Some other things I was approached to buy were: cold beer(top of the list), taxi, souvenir stuff, weed and special "massages" from girls at some club. I need to invest in one of these hats so that they would know that I am Jamaican in my original article outfit.

The North coast highway made most of the 4 hour drive home safe and uneventful. After I passed through Ocho Rios the twisty wet roads along with the single lane than JPS created while cutting down trees ruined somebody's day. The flagmen told us to stop, the man in front, me, the two cars behind all stopped, I heard a loud crash and saw lots of smoke.. some fool crashed into the back of last person. While looking in the rear view mirror still I see this taxi blazing down around the corner in the wrong lane and almost caused a head on collision with vehicles coming up.. damned fool. The next thing about 20 minutes down the road was a first for me, I was issued a traffic survey by the police. At first I saw some bright orange signs saying "Slow down", "Traffic Survey" and laughed to myself thinking they really meant the po-po were timing on that road, then as I turned the corner the police waved me down out of like 6 cars to stop. If I knew that it was really just a survey and they wanted to ask me questions about my journey I would have waved back and just gas it some more.. bastards.

on looking for entertainment

I was talking to a friend the other day and she was trying to understand how/why/what would lead people to dating and getting married to people they meet online. She was totally lost as to how to even meet someone online. I then explained to her that earlier in my more idle days online I used to hang out at a few online communities and I went out once with one of the girls there.

It sounds sad but it was really just for kicks, I had no problems finding girls to go out with. Anyway I met her in Halfway Tree and she brought along a friend for security.. lol. I don't blame her, there are some strange people online. When they got in my car she exclaimed that I was nothing like what she was expecting. I had to bite my tongue not to say that she was everything I expected to get in an online girl.

Since as far as I was concerned I picked up the bad end of the stick in this date I decided that she would be buying me drinks at the bar despite my initial offer of me taking her out to the bar for drinks. She didn't really put up much of a fight when I informed her that she would be treating so we proceeded to the then happening place Escape in New Kingston.

It was cool at first, she bought me my favorite drinks, we hung out and played games. Eventually I noticed that my friends had started to come in and this was a situation that I didn't really see myself explaining anytime soon so I said bye to my date and neatly tucked out of there. I didn't mean to make such a hasty retreat but at that point in time no amount of gin and tonics was worth it.

That being said, I just watched you got mail.. lol she wishes life was like the movies.

Things have changed but we're still the same

My phone beeped and I saw "Strike on friday". Granted that the friend that sent it worked at the NWC the first thing that came to mind that there would be no water on Friday but then my mind flashed back to when used to play counter strike from dusk till dawn. A quick phone call cleared it all up, they were planning a game night on campus for all the old veterans. Those were the good ole' days where we had no worries in the world and would pile up at a friends house or at a lab on campus and play games till we had no sense left.

Eventually we people started to drop off one by one as jobs, girlfriends**, children... etc started taking precedence and we had greater responsibilities to worry about. We were no longer university students and everybody got busy all of a sudden and the only thing we had time/energy left for was a game of dominos every now and then. Of course even the dominos died out after a while so we now gather more then than now to relive life like we were young again.

On the matter of things being the same last Friday I got a call from my ex Mel to remind me to call her for her birthday on the weekend... lol kinda pointless. Anyway we were talking and she complained that I haven't invited over for a long time. So since it was her birthday weekend and I haven't let her stay over in well over a year I invited her over to have a movie night like we often used to have before. Aside from the fact that we didn't actually watch any movies it was just like old times, I guess she will be a friend for a long time to come.

On the Saturday she went to go celebrate her birthday with other friends and I linked up with Barbq and went to an art show in Manor Park. Barbq used to live right beside me at my previous apartment a few years ago and I used to admire her from far as she was always busy with her then ever present boyfriend. Anyway the event itself was pretty small and uninteresting but I still had fun liming with her there. We got a few compliments from people saying how cute and happy we looked together as people seemed to have us confused as a couple.. definitely food for thought :). I asked about the bf and she told me they broke up a while back.. the plot thickens.

** of course before I finished typing this post I got a call that it has been postponed due to the admin who was sponsoring us the lab on campus forgot that today was an anniversary for him.

The wingman is back.. the sequel

After many months at sea wingman called and informed me that he will be back in Jamaica before the end of the month. I can foresee the interesting times ahead as a few things have changed which he has no visibility of(yet). The first of which is that noodle and I aren't together anymore. He is very long winded and the last time I told him I broke up with someone that conversation almost lasted two hours(ignoring the fact that he was calling from 1000s of miles away on a long distance call). So I can only imagine the verbal onslaught that will follow when he is back here and notices someone is missing.

My problems are trivial compared to the other item which he is unaware of. At the barbecue I met and chatted with his biggest crush. He has had a thing for this girl for over 7 years now.. I dunno why they never moved from just friends. Anyway we became friends while he was gone and it turns out he didn't know she was pregnant and recently had a baby. She asked me not to tell him, she eventually will, but this blows my mind as to how he was oblivious to it. It will be a hard task not telling him this bit of information but he is very well aware that I will mostly honor peoples requests to keep information under wraps.

Hopefully this will close that chapter of his life as it has been loooong drawn out. Due to the wealth of free time I have now and the pending news of his crush's baby I think he will be more than willing to live up to the name bestowed upon him and a night of debauchery is in order. Hopefully things haven't changed but there was never a shortage of ladies when we are out looking for trouble so this should put our past where it belongs :-p

Time heals all

I have a long way to go but I am on my way there. Before ending things with noodle on Tuesday I allowed her to explain the situation in case there was by some miracle a plausible explanation and it would have all been a big misunderstanding. After trying to deny deleting anything and accusing me of invading her privacy she started to give her reasons.

I already wrote an epistle here when I started this post a few days ago but that shall go unpublished and I will try to keep my comments on her reasons short.

• She referred to me as aunt because she was uncomfortable telling Joe she was out with her bf
• She kept her conversations with Joe a secret because I would misread it and make a big deal out of nothing. She further went on to explain that I was so jealous lately she didn't want to add fuel to that fire.
• She still maintained that nothing went on between them and she was just being foolish.

Noodle was under the impression that a storm on jealousy raged inside of me? This was news to me.. I always thought of myself as secure and nonchalant. I guess I will keep an eye out for it in future relationships, I don't believe I will find myself acting that way though. On a purely coincidental note on the Monday before any of her activities were exposed she showed me an email from one of her clean accounts from a friend that asked what were the top 3 things I valued in a relationship and asked me to answer. Loyalty, sincerity and happiness was my response... how heartless does one have to be to face me after that and lie?

Truth and time tells all

How does one say goodbye to a friend? Noodle and I were best friends for a long time before we got together, she knew everything about me and she (supposedly)told me about everything current in her life as well. Somewhere along the way during the beginnings of our friendship she met a guy, who we shall refer to as Joe, who she dated for a bit while he visited the island occasionally. This was the only guy I felt she never did give me the whole story on but it was okay though, she was in no way obligated to tell me anything at that point in time.

As the months passed he faded to the background and she started sharing some of her untold stories about her rendezvous with Joe which only served to grow my trust for her as she opted to fill in the remaining blanks without me asking about him. Our friendship grew to the point where she started to pursue me as a boyfriend but I was hesitant as I knew the nitty gritty of her past and what she was capable of but she swore her loyalty to me. After a few months passed I felt sure her intentions were pure she was invited to exclusively enjoy all that my simple forest life had to offer.

We all know how her life in the forest ended and she was free to do anything she pleased. She insisted I misjudged her, apologized for taking what she had for granted and still pursued a relationship with me. Her persistence payed off and my nos slowly changed to yeses and we ended up getting back together again in Negril. Now to rewind a bit back to Joe, even though he was faded to the background they still communicated via phone, email and im but I never payed much attention to it as I accepted him as just one of her friends. A few weeks ago she called saying Joe was going to send her a ticket to go visit him and she gave me an acceptable reason #1 for wanting to go, I told her if she wanted to go she should.

At some other point in time she brought back up her trip again asking several times if I was sure it was ok for her to go, the first red flag pops up in my head now as she seems to be feeling guilty of something, I still give her the go ahead. After questioning her motives again acceptable reason #1 has morphed to shady reason #2, I point out to her the change I noticed and she gets upset saying she told me this already and reason #1 was just the pill she fed her family so they wont hassle her for going to visit her friend. of course more red flags. It is obvious to me that there is more here than she lets on but I left it alone to give her time to come clean on her own as she got upset whenever I asked her about it and blamed me for not listening.

As far as I was concerned noodle was exhibiting textbook cheating behaviours so I kicked back and observed, there is no point to start an argument with nothing hard to back it. When we came back to Kingston after our trip over the weekend she went to the pc as usual to check her emails and other things online but I noticed she only flashed her inbox for a second then ignored it the entire time I was close. I said nothing to her as the last time I asked her to show me something in her inbox she said she would show me later but when later came around all conversations were mysteriously deleted without a trace and she had no idea where they went. I went back on Monday night after she left to find the following email trail in her trash.

From: noodle
To: joe
Subject: Hon!

honey you got my mail right? i sent you the dates. when you have the time please reply or call. hope you are good and things going in your favour. miss you!
take care, Love you.
God bless, noodle
---

From: noodle
To: joe
Subject: Re: Hon!

will you be coming to Jamaica this weekend?
---

From: joe
To: noodle

No, I was thinking you would come up ...
---

From: noodle
To: joe

i would love to come up this weekend except my aunt paid for our weekend already. what about the 2 november?

Aside from changing the names for anonymity and clipping the conversation for brevity the emails are untouched. Now this weekend she speaks of was the weekend she just spent with me. It's nice to know that she tells other men I am her aunt. Aside from those deleted messages her trash was empty, I guess I was too late to catch anything else but lucky enough to find those. I then glanced over her inbox to find this other gem

From: noodle
To: joe
Subject: hello

hi joe!

i know you are always busy, which is why i asked for a weekend thats convenient to you. but here is some available times for me starting 9-11.11.2007 im free, so you make a decision.

i really do miss you, its feels like forever since ive last seen you. i wont go in details how much i miss you and what i miss mostly, we will resolve that when we are together.

take care, love you

God bless

Noodle

wow.. I couldn't help but imagine what was said on the phone/in the messages she deleted and emptied from the trash and from the im chat which she explicitley turned off logging for Joe despite the fact she logs everybody elses conversations. I would love to see her explain this one, but I didn't say a word to her until I saw her online the following day. This post is already long and drawn out so I'll post her response later.

The grass is greener on the other side

After a set of long drawn out discussions Noodle and I are officially dunzo. I am no relationship expert but as far as I'm concerned we were not compatible due to the DR. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde persona she took on in the few weeks preceding our demise. The complaints, resentment, disappointment and bitterness she directed towards me made it clear what needed to be done.

She is normally a very nice girl though so in trying to make sense of her changes into Mr. Hyde I imagined the following explanation so as to not get dirty with details: Maybe she expected a knight in shining armour riding a stallion to come and whisk her away to a pampered life of luxury and no worries but instead she got me, Shrek, an ogre in rags who throws her on his donkey's back and carries her to a life of hard work for her to earn her keep.

Now this ogre was as entertaining as a rock, he thoroughly enjoyed sitting back and watching the grass grow. Tired of life in the forest, working for her supper and watching grass grow his fair maiden longed to go to the royal balls in the town and be treated as a princess should. To further complicate things there was a line of prince charmings with promises to fill said void in her life. Infuriated that all of her grooming and kisses wasn't turning her stubborn ogre into a prince she started unleash Mr. Hyde upon the ogre's humble forest life.

The ogre realizing he was the cause of all the fair maiden's distress surrendered his hold on her and released her back to her village where she can pursue her dream life with the prince of her choice. It was a hard decision to make but the ogre realizes he will never be a prince nor expect his maiden to live the ogre lifestyle and be happy but she seems to be afraid of change forgetting all of her problems she had with the ogre and wants to come back to the forest. The water is always wetter when the well runs dry.

She will be missed.. This song Ralph Tresvant - do what I gotta do seems most appropriate

Yesterday

I am showing signs of being burnt out, yesterday was Tuesday but when work called at 5:30am I was convinced it was Saturday. I looked at my phone it said Tuesday.. still not convinced I went to my PC it said Tuesday too... where did the weekend and Monday go? It was nice waking up so early in the morning though, it gave me time to relax, eat breakfast and watch some TV instead of the usual rush to get ready and leave for work.

I went to my office uptown and spent a couple hours there, it only take me 5 minutes to reach work up there and it is free flowing all the way against the traffic so I smiled to myself as I drive by people stuck in long lines of bumper to bumper hell. After traffic died down I left to go to corporate building and spent some time there before going downtown to my main office for lunch. I have to pass through some locations and make my presence felt or people might feel I don't need my shit anymore and steal things from my desks. I am still loving the freedom to choose where I want to work for the day.

Later on in the night I went to a launch party with wifey for some model search competition.. Talk about carrying sand to the beach, the place was packed with girls dressed to the bone and only a handful of men. I'm serious when I say the ratio was something of the order of 20+ girls for 1 man.. Too bad wingman wasn't there, I'm sure even he could have gotten a girl there last night. Anyway I had to call it a night early as I got a call from work and I was on standby.

Needless to say wifey wasn't too happy about us leaving early but hey work is work, it pays the bills. This is my second straight week of standby and I'm possibly in for a third if my boss flies out next week. The money is more than welcome as my car insurance is due in a few weeks and I'm sure after the last incident the premiums will be nothing short of fantastic.

Hello Boston, MA

I leave on the first flight out tomorrow and will be spending the rest of next week on a training course up there. I must say that this whole thing was rushed, even though I knew I was supposed to be attending this course two months ago. The hotel was booked yesterday, the plane ticket was bought yesterday and they gave me the money for travelling 10 minutes before I left work on Friday at 4:40pm.

As far as I was concerned I wasn't going anywhere since as at yesterday morning nothing was paid for in relation to my travels. It didn't dawn upon me until I reached home that maybe I should have gone to the bank to withdraw some money from my US account for myself in case I want to go shopping too(but of course the banks would be closed and will not open today either so I'm stuck with whatever money work gave me). Thank you for credit cards although I don't really see myself shopping much up there.

I am so tired right now as I'm writing this.. I should be sleeping now, I leave on the first flight out at 6am and I didn't get much sleep last night. Wifey and I went to the titty bar and didn't reach home till 5am giving me about 3 hours of sleep so I am currently in debt. I must say I am all stripper's worst nightmare. Shortly after we sat down and I ordered a drink wifey was sitting on my lap with the money to pay. As the bar girl came back with the drink/change I noticed a hot, young, slim, light brown, cute stripper[drools] hopped off the stage into the VIP lounge right on the lap of wifey sitting on me.

Now this stripper obviously had a plan to get some of my change but wifey didn't swing that way and was thoroughly disgusted by the stripper's advances and wondering hands violating her body. The stripper realizing she wasn't having it actually had no money then turned to me and begged some money. Anybody who knows me know that I would not be surrendering anything to a stripper(no matter how hot they are) and I'm sure this girl knows this now but she grabbed a one feel from wifey's breast before she got off her and left. Wifey is understandably afraid of strippers now, many apologies, I'm sure you will recover :p. Well enough babble for now, hopefully I get enough sleep before I have to wake up at 4:30am tomorrow.. my eyes are already 3/4 closed :(

TUI - truth under the influence?

I was looking at the empty bottles(mainly consumed by my guests) on top of the cupboards in the kitchen and started to remember some of the good and bad times this evil liquid has brought me. The main train of thought was around the drunken confession of love. I used to have a friend that would go out get drunk and somehow used to manage to find herself back at my place at 4am in the morning. I would let her in and try to get back to sleep but she had other plans which I never really mind losing some sleep over.

A few times during these early morning booty calls in her drunken state she proclaimed her love for me, right in the heat of things. This threw me off completely at first, it wasn't something I wanted so I ignored it and handled the business at hand. She was well aware I wasn't interested in her that way so whenever I confronted her about it after, when she was sober, she was a little embarrassed and said she couldn't help how she felt and things just come out when she is high. I think she also said it to me after she smoked some weed too lol. Now this girl(when sober) claims to be fully against love, to quote her: "I doh believe in dat shit", so I never knew what to make of her and just ignored the burbs that came out of her when she was high.

The fact that she had a boyfriend made it so much easier to write off what she said under the influence also. On the flip side I remember going to a bar early one morning as things were winding down around 4:00am. I met up with some friends standing in the parking lot as I walked in, said hi and turned around to talk to some other people I knew only to turn back around to see a guy aggressively hugging some (drunk)girl who I said hi to a minute before. I was well aware this girl wasn't fond of me before but I am civil but one of her friends came over later and explained to me the guy wasn't hugging her, he was more holding her back from fighting me. There was an angel watching over that girl that night, I:

1. was 100% sober
2. am a man
3. had 50lbs on her
4. would be acting in self defence and hence had no problem beating up a drunk girl who wants to pick a fight with me because she didn't like me for no good reason. (yay woman lib and equality)

I always figured she never liked me but our common friends made us cross paths often. I just figured she was smart enough to pick fights which she could manage, its a good thing the guy held her back. How about we all stay sober until we learn how to manage our emotions under the influence?

I was drunk is the lamest of excuses.

To being just as deep

I was sitting at my desk downtown this week wondering if I should go spend some time at the corporate building.. One thing that came to mind immediately is all the nice eye candy that fills the canteen at lunch time that my eyes normally feast on while I fill my belly. The next thing that came to mind is that their nice round rumps never normally had any panty lines as my friend here unknowingly demonstrates heh.

After speaking to a few girls and also remembering something on TV about said matter, VPL, visible panty lines are is a serious offence to some women. Personally I don't care but one of my friends said she reached to work one day and her boss (female of course) pointed out her VPL and asked her if she could fix it. WTF.. how shallow and pointless can you get? she just left for home to fix it but decided not to go back for the rest of the day understandably.

Not that I am complaining or anything but I think these women need to focus their energies on something a little more worthwhile than that.. on the flip side I thank y'all for the unobstructed pantyline-less pocket free views as I gaze upon your behind in your fitted tailored pants. Dark pants such as black, navy blue or white does the trick of getting me salivating so the food slides down with ease, many thanks.

Who can relate to birds doing the nasty?

Apparently I can. I was looking out my kitchen window this morning while contemplating what to do for breakfast when I saw these birds carrying on bad. Ok maybe they weren't doing the nasty but that's a bit close to be normal company seeing the power line they were sitting on was about 100 feet long and they were the only two birds on it. Maybe a bird expert can come in a tell me why the other one didn't find his own spot on the line.

This sparked some memories of my adventures in sharing a bed with girls. One such adventure was with Original, I used to walk past her apartment on my way to/from the car park and probably after 4 short conversations she asked me to stay with her one night. She was hot, I was single, why not? We did exactly as I agreed to, I slept on my side of her bed and she stayed on her side(she had a big bed) then I woke up and went about my business back at my place in the morning. Over the next couple of days as she got to know me better she progressively inched her way over until she was sleeping with her head on my chest. Needless to say the following week, by the time I dozed off she was completely on me, not touching the bed, like those two birds in the picture above.

Now I wasn't complaining as I said she was hot, one of those girls that made my toes curl and my big 6"2' frame could manage her slim form but I remember looking over at all the empty space on her bed and foolishly wondering whats wrong with it, the bed must be more comfortable than me. I have since asked another offender for a reason of the invasion of personal space and the explanation given was that she felt safe when she was touching me. Of course they would kick up a storm when I roll over on my side and my back is facing them in efforts to get comfortable. Really now lets not be obsessive compulsive but sometimes personal space can be good.

pip pip.

Goodbye lover, hello friend.

Recently my friend threatened to steal my condoms and of course after she left my house there were none to be found. I asked her where they were and she said she took them so that I can't bump nasties with anybody until she brings them back.. now there is a foolproof plan. I later found them hidden under a pillow but this is just silly I should just stop such relations with her, cold turkey, as she is clearly confused.

This is a familiar fork in the road and the decision is hard especially when the girls have the goodies to make my toes curl. Local culture would state "dem have the glue to mek man stay" as I always kick myself after seeing some fine ass girls I've pushed to the curb previously. The problem is that these girls are not right, there is always a major problem that clashes with my requirements of a sustainable relationship. They may get A+ for body, A+ for looks, A+ for cleaning my apt, washing my clothes and cooking for me, but they fail horribly when they sign me up as Joe grind or claim to break up with their man when things start to get steamy with me.

I am glad I have enough sense not to stay or to grow those situations any further than some bump and grind. What is interesting though is that I am able to keep them as platonic friends after, though it would explain why it is hard for me to get some of my female friends to be civil to each other. The big question is do I end things with this condom hiding girl? She doesn't meet my requirements to be a girlfriend but her body is up to spec, I lose about 30 IQ points just looking at her and she does everything humanly possible to please me. This is definitely a road block on my road to finding wifey to settle down with.